#Latergram from me and @djkalisemo’s performance at the #SugarBar last Saturday. Many thanks to everyone who supported!
Get his project Unfinished Thoughts. Dope #music, plus I’m on two of the tracks 😊 #MorganTaylorJones #livemusic #music #nyc #TheMood #singer

Moment of Honesty: Shaky Faith

Today I had an epiphany. What triggered it? God blessed me with something I didn’t expect but needed. And it got me thinking…

If God continues to show up and show out in my life when I don’t always fully trust Him, imagine what He could/would do for me if I really put all my eggs in the “Faith” basket.

Don’t take that statement for a moment of selfishness. Nor a moment of being egotistical, full of myself, or narcissistic. It was just a true lightbulb moment. The things that God does for me now, even when I don’t expect them or don’t initially think He can/will do, He does. So just think if I really surrendered myself to Him…what He would do then? Whew. I know it’d be awesome things.

Just some personal food for thought that I wanted to share and that I thought someone else can relate to. It definitely got me thinkin’ today; and I’m sure will continue to do so.

xo

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"You can fail at what you don’t want; so you might as well take the chance on doing what you love."

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2 Years and Counting

You know how they say there are landmark moments in your life that you’ll never forget? Well I hope I never forget June 12, 2012 and to reflect upon it each year…because tracking and tracing personal progression are key. 

Today marks two years since I moved to New York. Both so much and  feelings of so little have happened since I made that trip with two suitcases and a one way ticket two summers ago. 

I could talk about the hurt, frustration, confusion, loneliness, times of being broke, sadness, feelings of defeat, and more. Or I could mention the joy, happiness, excitement, blushing, exhilarating excitement, and liberation this city embodies and brings out of me. But instead I’ll talk about the non stop pushing I have to remind myself to do. 

So often it feels like I’m running with no end in sight. I become consumed in feelings of wondering if my true purpose and passions are what I really have always imagined them to be. However, in times contrary to all of that, I experience tangible moments which remind me that I’m on the right track. Unfortunately, though, those moments don’t seem to come as often as I’d like and feelings of defeat seem to reign supreme. 
Yet again, in the midst of all of that, I am reminded (whether by myself or by a friend or family member) to keep pushing. There are lessons within all of this. Whether or not I actually see or feel them is one thing. And whether or not I like what the lesson may reveal is a completely different thing. But identifying that no parts of this journey are taken in vain is what I must remind myself of to ensure that I keep pushing. Because while there are lessons and moments I’ve yet to understand, I do recognize that I’m still stronger and braver than I ever thought I was or knew I could be.  So whatever you do Morgan, don’t stop. Get out of your own way; and just keep swimming. 
730 days down, NY. Let’s keep going. 
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hellyeahchaneliman:

 Liya Kebede, Chanel Iman, Bethann Hardison, Iman and Joan Smalls celebrating Ms. Hardison at the CFDA Awards

hellyeahchaneliman:

Liya Kebede, Chanel Iman, Bethann Hardison, Iman and Joan Smalls celebrating Ms. Hardison at the CFDA Awards

(via fuckyeahfamousblackgirls)

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what-id-wear:

What I’d Wear : The Outfit Database

(source : The Daileigh )

Yes.

what-id-wear:

What I’d Wear : The Outfit Database

(source : The Daileigh )

Yes.

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Take Me Back…

…to 2007. When my biggest concern was how much lunch money my parents would spot me for the week. When my friends and I sped back to school to make sure we made it back to class on time on our way back from open lunch (off campus). When I hoped my senior graduation photo looked good enough for the year book. Take me back to when my friend would text me that she was on the way to pick me up, honked twice once she pulled up to my house, and we’d head to Greensboro at 10pm on a random summer night because there was nothing to do in Durham…but more so just because we felt like it.To when one of my biggest teenage decisions of that summer was deciding between getting the belly button piercing or the tattoo. (Bet you’re now wondering which one I decided on. Ha.) When I still lived at home and thoughts of having enough money for rent, food, or transportation were questions that never crossed my mind.

…to 2001. When I walked into my parents room and told them I wanted to be a singer. And said it with such confidence and conviction that no one could change my mind or talk me out of it. I miss that fearless 12 year old. Take me back to that night. Take me back to her. More so, bring her to me now. Because if you really catch what I’m saying, there’s major difference and significance in taking me back to her versus bringing her to me now. Think about it…

Just take me back to the early to mid 2000s when the sureness of what I wanted to do was the solid, concrete foundation of which I stood upon. Fearless. Unchanged. Couldn’t be swayed. Unapologetic. Take me back to the mentality of the teenage me who told her parents she wasn’t going to college right after high school because she needed to move to New York to pursue her dreams. And didn’t sway from that. Take me back to a mind of pureness, undeterred, not clouded, nor jaded by the ways and obligations of the world. Take me back to my own fearlessness that I once possessed. 

Even if only for a moment of reminder/refresher/rejuvenation, just take me back. 

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Rest peacefully Granddaddy… As my family and I said our final physical goodbyes to my grandfather yesterday, I was reminded that his spirit and legacy will forever live within all of us. To everyone who reached out during this time, thank you. Your calls, texts, prayers, and more are extremely appreciated. Granddaddy, you are loved immensely and will forever remain in our hearts 💙

Rest peacefully Granddaddy… As my family and I said our final physical goodbyes to my grandfather yesterday, I was reminded that his spirit and legacy will forever live within all of us. To everyone who reached out during this time, thank you. Your calls, texts, prayers, and more are extremely appreciated. Granddaddy, you are loved immensely and will forever remain in our hearts 💙

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People Watching, Reversed.

I, as many of us, am admittedly a “people watcher.” But not in a judgmental or creepy way; more so in an observatory way. Whether on the train, walking down the street, or waiting in an airport, I pay attention to the people around me and simply just wonder about them. What’s their story? Where are they heading? Where are they from? Are they traveling for business or leisure? They look upset - what’s happened?

As I wonder, it’s just the thinker and observer in me being curiously active. I’m big on “you never know what people go through/are going through,” so simple curiosity is probably where my observations stem from. 

Today, as I was walking through the airport, I was reminded of my own aforementioned mantra. You never know what people are going through. I was heading home to Durham for probably one of the saddest trips I’ll make. I’m going to be with my family because my grandfather passed away a few days ago. Externally, I had it together. But internally, my mind was frantically wandering about what I was preparing to face. Even prior to heading to the airport, as a lady in the coffee shop and, later, my cab driver asked me where I’m going, as I told them, “I’m going home to see my family,” they were left oblivious to the facts of what I was going for. 

And as I walked through the airport, heading to my gate, I wondered if anyone was observing and/or questioning me. “Where is she going?” “What is she going for?” Not in a selfish, need for attention way did I wonder if they noticed me. But just wondered if they were the same as I - someone interested in people’s stories. 

So often today, we don’t pay enough attention to one another. We’re caught up in our trinkets, cell phones, and tablets. We’re all consumed in our own world usually more often than wondering about the well being of anyone else’s. Today I was an example of, “you never know what people are going through; so don’t judge and be kind to one another.” As I talked to the woman in the coffee shop this morning, told her I was going to see family, and she told me to, “Have a blessed trip and enjoy being with them,” she had no idea what that meant to me. Even if she was my only “people watcher” of the day, to her I say, “Thank you.”

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This Time Last Year, I Quit My Job

This time last year, I quit my job. And for some [significant] reason, I remembered that today. So once I remembered, I searched through my old journals to find the day I wrote about it.

What’s funny is I didn’t actually journal on the day I quit. I wrote about the days leading up to it, wrote on what I now presume is the night before I gave my notice, and wrote an entry on the day after my last day. The common thread among all these entries? The reason why I was quitting.

If you really know me, you know the things I went through at that job. Few people know the various daily unfortunate happenings that occurred while I was there. Yet, while reading these old personal journal entries, my reasons for quitting were deeper than my disdain for my circumstance and position during that time. I was quitting because I needed to get back to “me.” If that job taught me nothing else, in mentally flashing back to that season via the readings of my own thoughts, being in that position showed me that I had to get back to doing what I’ve done/always wanted to do/continue to [set out to] do - music and modeling.

In hesitantly choosing to end my first, major, consistent flow of income, I decided to cut the shit. Stop BS’ing this on train called life and do what I moved to New York for and have vividly dreamed about since I was a little girl. So why did I remember that today? Why, on this day, did I remember that I quit my first “big girl job” a year ago to delve myself into music and modeling. I think I remembered it today because of what I’ve been feeling recently - stagnant, complacent, and confused. 

Yes, I’ve made strides since then. I’ve had some great opportunities in both music and modeling since then. But have I done enough? Am I doing enough? No. Why not? Because I admittedly get in my own way. And I so badly want to change that, yet struggle with how to do so. Constantly. Thus, today I brought it up in conversation with a few friends. Through our conversations and somehow (*really via God; no coincidence) realizing that it’s been just a bit over 365 days that I left my last job to dive deeply into the real “job” I want/life I want to live…it’s just interesting to me.

My last day at that previous company was May 9, 2013. I’m posting this on May 15, 2014 in the midst of feeling conflicted and confused about where I currently am (mentally, career wise, financially, etc.) 

There’s a reason why I remembered this time last year during this moment this year. I can’t let go of why I chose to take that leap and make that big change then. I can’t. And if it takes me reading those entries over and over to do so, then so be it.

Remember why you started, Morgan. Remember why you started.